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Topic Subject:Story Time 3.2
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Jayhawk
Eminence Grise
posted 08-18-99 09:07 ET (US)         
To put mouse at ease well continue Story Time 3 in this little thread.

The adventue continues as George the Lion is getting ready to capture the Woolley Jumper, aka, the Golden Fleece, or was it Golden Fleas...

[This message has been edited by Jayhawk (edited 08-18-99).]

AuthorReplies:
Proconsul Creaticus Dania
Angel
posted 08-18-99 14:00 ET (US)     1 / 142       
The Golden Sheep spotted George, and started walking against him thinking it has got a new golden friend.

George looked at the fence and said to Apollo: "Can't you make it a bit bigger? See the sheep thinks I'm a sheep and must not find out I'm a lion. So the fence must be so big that I can jump out in the other end before the sheep find out it has made a mistake (and I also don't want to adopt it's fleas, golden ore not)"

And then.......

------------------
Member of the RSPCE & RSPLN


Civis Romanus
Angel
posted 08-18-99 20:40 ET (US)     2 / 142       
"Not to worry," said Apollo. "I'll put a pen in place not even the Wooly Jumper can escape." Apollo clapped his hands and the pen's fencing grew to twice its original heighth. "How's that, George?"

"That'll do," said George. So George took advantage of the Wooly Jumper's curiosity while others hid behind bushes and trees to conceal themselves from sight. George pranced around making a show of himself, manuevering around and about the flock, never too close or too far to cause alarm or disinterest. But he wasn't getting anywhere. The Wooly Jumper would only go so far towards George, and no farther.

Frustrated, George plunked himself down in front of the pen and started to play with his mane, twirling a curl here and a curl there. Oddly, the Wooly Jumper now started to pay more attention to George than to the flock. The more George curled his mane, the closer the golden sheep came.

Eventually, George's mane was absolutely covered with curls and the Wooly Jumper was only yards away. George casually got back on all four paws and slowly padded to the back of the pen, with the fencing of the pen between himself and the sheep, but with his head and mane still in plain view. The not-too-bright Wooly Jumper approached George by entering the pen. Very quickly Apollo and Incon jumped out from behind two nearby bushes and slammed the pen's gate shut. Try as it might, the startled Wooly Jumper could not leap high enough to escape. Finally, the sheep set itself down on the ground in resignation.

Seeing the pen gate closed securely on the now entrapped Wooly Jumper, George said,"...

[This message has been edited by Civis Romanus (edited 08-18-99).]

Jayhawk
Eminence Grise
posted 08-19-99 05:38 ET (US)     3 / 142       
"This experience really made my mane curl..."
Proconsul Creaticus Dania
Angel
posted 08-19-99 17:30 ET (US)     4 / 142       
And then he went to a nearby river to take a bath. When he came back, looking like a drowned mouse, he had only one comment "Can I now have my carrots?"

Looking a bit red in his face Apollo replied: "Ahrm, eh, don't know how to say it. You se, the sheep escaped when ehrm I opened the gate so if you....?"

"First the carrots and then maybe I'll think about it" George answered. And then he started eating his carrots while PCD was busy drying him with a towel.
--------------------------------------
my posting nr. 302
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[This message has been edited by Proconsul Creaticus Dania (edited 08-19-99).]

Jayhawk
Eminence Grise
posted 08-20-99 04:01 ET (US)     5 / 142       
Of course it wasn't just George looking like a drowned mouse, while toweling him of Dania found mouse looking like...a wet cat. She'd fallen asleep in George's mane and this bath had rudely wakened her.
Incontinentia
Pleb
posted 08-20-99 08:31 ET (US)     6 / 142       
Mouse shook the water out of her ears and put her hands on her hips. "If that just doesn't take the biscuit!" she squeaked. "You want to learn how to catch a Golden-Fleeced Sheep? Follow me..."
Civis Romanus
Angel
posted 08-20-99 22:03 ET (US)     7 / 142       
The silly Wooly Jumper had escaped but hadn't gone very far as a patch of munchable grass had caught its attention. Mouse quietly sneaked up on the Wooly Jumper, climbed its left rear leg, lightly tread across the golden wool on the sheep's back and settled on the animal's rounded head. The Wooly Jumper never noticed as the delicious green grass garnered its total attention.

Mouse began to whisper in the sheep's ear. Soon the Wooly Jumper ceased chewing and looked longingly to where the pen lay open and waiting. Mouse continued to whisper, saying...

Jayhawk
Eminence Grise
posted 08-23-99 05:44 ET (US)     8 / 142       
You'll never believe how green the grass is at the other side of that fence. Did nobody ever tell you the grass is always greener at the other side of the fence?

She scratched herself, where did that awfull itch come from...

------------------
Homage to thee, Osiris, Lord of Eternity, King of the Gods, whose names are manifold, whose forms are holy, thou being of hidden form in the temples, whose Ka is holy."
-- Book of the Dead (1240 BC)


Civis Romanus
Angel
posted 08-23-99 15:33 ET (US)     9 / 142       
"Us."

Mouse heard a squeak that was squeakier than her own. And it came from somewhere on her furry self. "Who is that?" she asked.

"Fleas."

"What kind of fleas?"

"Golden."

"You all don't say much. Why"

"Small."

"How did you get on me?"

"Hopped."

"Okay...well you can just hop right off."

"Can't."

"Oh yeah? Well, why not?"

And the fleas said...

Tim The Great
Pleb
posted 08-23-99 19:02 ET (US)     10 / 142       
"It's too hot too."

"No it's not."

"Yes it is."

"Says who?"

"Me says who."

"Me to says who..."

"It's confusing, says Tim the Great!

------------------
42209768
Prowd Member of the RSPLN
and don't forget to check out Tim the Great's own e-mail server www.homestead.com/CaesarIIIPage/email.html

Proconsul Creaticus Dania
Angel
posted 08-23-99 19:56 ET (US)     11 / 142       
"I find it confusing too," said mouse "who's who?"

"I am Who"

"And I'm cold"

"No, I'm Cold"

"Sorry I ment I'm getting cold."

"Cold, you are crazy Too, it's hot"

And the Golden Sheep said: "Good bye" and shoke itself like a wet dog and out of the fleece flew mouse. "Finally I got rid off those fleas" and then it ran away to the other sheep.

Happily mouse ended in som grass so she didn't get hurt.

"I must get rid of those fleas, where is the river" said mouse.

But then Apollo said: ..............

------------------
Member of the RSPCE & RSPLN


[This message has been edited by Proconsul Creaticus Dania (edited 08-23-99).]

Tim The Great
Pleb
posted 08-23-99 23:27 ET (US)     12 / 142       
...You can't get rid of the golden fleas just by going in the water. You have to keep in mind, that they are GOLDEN! They have a different lung system and so on and so fourth...

------------------
42209768
Prowd Member of the RSPLN
and don't forget to check out Tim the Great's own e-mail server www.homestead.com/CaesarIIIPage/email.html

Jayhawk
Eminence Grise
posted 08-24-99 08:43 ET (US)     13 / 142       
But they're driving me crazy mouse muttered, she looked at her back and said
"the little tykes are playing hopscotch on me!
Get them off, get them off"
Cherub Stone Cold
Pleb
posted 08-24-99 11:55 ET (US)     14 / 142       
(may only be funny to people who were here for the original, and best) but all of a sudden, the Rabbit came down and poured Trix onto the back of mouse. And since everyone knows Trix isn't for Golden Fleas...
Proconsul Creaticus Dania
Angel
posted 08-24-99 12:46 ET (US)     15 / 142       
"OH NO, STOP" shouted Apollo "What is Trix, does it kill the fleas? Remember I need them, but alive"
Civis Romanus
Angel
posted 08-24-99 15:33 ET (US)     16 / 142       
Civis Romanus was laughing so much he sat down hard on the grass covered ground as he fought for a breath of air. Out of the corner of his eye he spied George lying on the grass not far from where Civis sat.

The sad state of the satiated lion, who had finally gotten his bunch of carrots, was lamentable. George lay there, flat on his back, tummy well rounded, paws in the air, eyes half closed, mouth open and tongue lolling out. He muttered repeatedly, "Sooo good...sooo good...carrots...love carrots."

You'd think he'd just attended an all day bacchanal to look at him, thought Civis, shaking his head. "Hey mouse!" called Civis. "Let George take care of the Golden Fleas."

Mouse, scratching all over, didn't understand at first. Then she caught on to what Civis was saying. She scurried over to the prostrate lion and jumped aboard his carrot-filled tummy. "Okay, Golden Fleas...everyone OFF!"

The fleas saw their opportunity and promptly left mouse for the new territory offered by the unaware lion. George began to twitch, then squirm. Slowly opening one eye and then the other, George said...

Proconsul Creaticus Dania
Angel
posted 08-24-99 17:19 ET (US)     17 / 142       
"GRROOUUWWWWLLLL. You are lucky, mouse I'm a vegetarian, and you too Civis, that I only hate one thing and that's market ladies. Apollo, you've got two minutes to save your fleas." And than he took a big tuft of grass in his mouth and headed for the river.

------------------
Member of the RSPCE & RSPLN


Incontinentia
Pleb
posted 08-25-99 07:57 ET (US)     18 / 142       
"My FLEAS!!" Apollo cried, readying up a good thunderbolt.

"My LION!!" PCD shrieked, leaping between them.

"My GODS!!!" Incon, who'd just returned, cried for no reason in particular.

"My flaming HIDE!!" George growled, heading for the river.

"Get the fleas!" Apollo roared.

"Get my lion!" PCD hollered.

"Get that god!" Civis shouted, just to add to the fun.

Incon brought the general brouhaha to a halt by slowly dragging her fingernails across a blackboard (which had conveniently appeared from nowhere, just at that moment). Eveyone halted and put their hands over their ears, complaining.

"So, it's fleas ya want catchin', eh?" Incon (who sounded remarkably like Robert Shaw all of a sudden) asked them. "I'll catch yer fleas for 500...dinarii. I'll stuff and mount 'em for free."

Apollo looked at her and said...

Jayhawk
Eminence Grise
posted 08-25-99 08:02 ET (US)     19 / 142       
George walked into the river, slowly, holding his head up high. As the water rose, the fleas fled up. They ran up his haunches. They ran up his head. They ran up his nose and finally grasped the gras as George submerged and let go of the grass.

The tuft floated off and tiny, tinny voices could be heard, "man the oars, we're sinking, damn the torpedoes, where are the lifeboats"

Apollo watched in horror,
"My fleas," he said...

Tim The Great
Pleb
posted 08-25-99 11:49 ET (US)     20 / 142       
"Ah I don't need em' that much, their just for extra flavor."
"Extra flavor, for what might I ask," asked George.

"Yes extra flaor for my soup! Who wants some?"

The group all started yellin,"I want some, me too, over here apollo, come on!"

"Ok hold on on at a time, one at a time. Just let me warm it up, ok?"

25 minutes later...

Incontinentia
Pleb
posted 08-25-99 13:20 ET (US)     21 / 142       
...Incon walked up to the group, dripping wet, holding a tiny Royal National Lifeguard boat in her hands. "Does anyone still want these golden fleas?" she asked.

Looking on the deck and inside, they could see each tiny flea wearing a teeny dayglo orange lifejacket, with a miniscule blanket wrapped around them, sipping teensy mugs of warming cocoa.

A bigger, non-golden flea - David Hasselflea - could be seen in the bow wearing dayglo orange lifeguard's trunks and was trying to get the golden fleas to join in a spirit-lifting sing-song.

"Well?" Incon asked...

Legion123
Pleb
posted 08-25-99 13:31 ET (US)     22 / 142       
walks up and looks in the little boat.

"Where'd you get this?"

Proconsul Creaticus Dania
Angel
posted 08-25-99 15:11 ET (US)     23 / 142       
Hm, got a problem. Is it OK to ask an angle (Jayhawk) to watch his language? Or does the word "damn" mean anything I don't know off?

------------------
Member of the RSPCE & RSPLN


Civis Romanus
Angel
posted 08-25-99 15:25 ET (US)     24 / 142       
"Puddlewatch Headquarters," said Incon. "Well, Apollo. You want these Golden Fleas or not." She was getting just a little impatient, tapping her feet expectantly on the ground.

Apollo said...

Legion123
Pleb
posted 08-25-99 16:17 ET (US)     25 / 142       
Perhaps Jayhawk is trying to recreate Admiral Farraguts quotation which he probably is most famous "Damn the torpedos(mines) ! Full speed ahead!"
Besides, it wouldnt be accurate if it was "darn the torpedos" it would sound very different...
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